Reasons why wall-e sucked.

I was baby sitting some kids for some extra money, and the parents, which were those parents that wanted one of those "Romantic night outs" And trust a complete stranger to watch their kids, (Which I never got.) said to take "good care" of our children. I already am, I don't neglect them and go out on fancy excursions, I never would let my children watch shitty movies like yours do. I wanted to say that but instead I said, "certainly." and they were off to were ever people like them go.(Rich fuckers.) All was going well, then the kids asked for a movie to go to sleep, now I don't mean to cause nostalgic feelings, or a grandpa speech for some, but when I was a kid I always wanted my parents read books to me in order to make me go to sleep.I didn't want to give them the grandpa speech so I went to help them pick out a movie. Lots of shit movies were in there, except for one which was "The lion king." other then censoring Shakespeare the film was possible my favorite Pixar film. I said, "we should watch this." but the kids were not even considering my genius idea. They all whispered into each others ears, (There were three of them, and they didn't want to talk to me.) and held up a movie called, "Wall-e" how bad could it be? I had actually heard good things about it. I regret ever watching that god awful movie. Why? This is why:


1. The music. I don't hate old music or anything, but they just had to choose the shittiest old music ever. Also they're in the future. THE FUCKING FUTURE! Why are the listening to old music? That's like driving a Flintstones' car in star wars.

2. The fact that robots had emotions. They're from the future and basically every sci-fi film from back in the day strictly forbids for robots to have emotions. Why would they even think that it would be a good idea to give them emotions? They listen to the old music, but they don't watch the movies.

3. How did the people even reproduce? They were fat as fuck, and had to rely on chairs to move their lazy asses around. Was there a special function on the chair that allowed for sexual intercourse?

4. I know this probably was never, considered since this movie was made for dumb ass kids who don't question a movie, even thought they got this part a little bit right the gravity on the space ship would most likely not support their bones, and since they're are lazy ass chair riders, they couldn't exercise. They say that their bones were small, but as long as they were on that ship and how little they moved, they shouldn't have had any bones at all.

5. The ending was just a, "Lets see how we can make this movie seem more stupid than it already is" kind of ending. honestly the ending was just a fucking stupid. So as I said before those lazy asshole chair riding pieces should have no bones. But they walk out of the ship like it was no big deal. Even if they had bones like the movie stated they would just snap like a toothpick. Aside from that they're just going to rely on one little plant to feed a whole large group of fat asses. One plant! They all died! There will be no sequel at least.

:The kids were asleep at the end and I was done. I turned off the rolling credits, got out my book, and read until the parents came to give me 20$, I really feel like I deserved a lot more than that for having to sit through that, what people call movie. I really wasn't in no mood to argue, I was in more of a mood to crack my skull open an just erase all the memory in my head as if it were a teenagers computer. I grabbed the twenty, went home, cried in the shower, and decided to write about that shit experience I had.